


What May Have Been

by JazzGirl123



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 01:26:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13043631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JazzGirl123/pseuds/JazzGirl123
Summary: It started with a kiss, how did it end up like this?





	What May Have Been

**Author's Note:**

> my gift for alicebarron! i hope they like it!

 

It started after a nasty akuma attack and Chat Noir was left with a gaping gash on his shoulder. Marinette had been nearby, having transformed back (not that he knew that), and she practically yanked him into her home.

She had scolded him for his recklessness as he nibbled on her cookies, a somewhat good gag actually for when she put the rubbing alcohol on his wound. Maybe he hadn’t been the most careful cat around, but he didn’t want to  _ hear  _ it, especially from her, so he distracted her with fashion questions (none too obvious of course).

Somehow though, it worked and he ended up coming back the night after the next. It became their  _ thing _ , sharing cookies and jokes under the moonlight on her terrace. And he couldn’t be more grateful, glad he could see the part of her she didn’t show  _ Adrien _ .

She was his first friend, and he want to ruin what they had. Even when - no, especially when he realized he was in love with her.

So when one Tuesday night, in the living room of her apartment, privately celebrating her twenty-fourth birthday, she kissed him, he froze.

He sat there, staring wide-eyed like an  _ idiot _ , until she pulled away, blushing a pretty pink. She avoided his gaze, placing her hands on her lap.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “I thought….um, I read this all wrong. I’m sorry.”

She began to move away and suddenly he recalled being fifteen when she’d run in the opposite direction of him. His heart lurched; no, he didn’t want that again. He grabbed her hands, stopping her from getting up.

“No, no! You didn’t read anything wrong, Princess, trust me. It’s just….” Did she still hate Adrien, he wondered? “I can’t…. _ date _ in uniform, you know? You deserve to be taken out on dates and showered in affections, and I can’t….do that.”

Hawkmoth was far more reckless dangerous nowadays. It was a huge risk for Chat to even visit Marinette, nevermind be with her.

“I know,” she said softly, reaching up to touch the skin beneath his mask. Somehow, he knew she understood what was he really trying to say. “Then let’s not date. Let’s be friends.”

“With benefits?” Chat asked before his brain could catch up with his mouth. She flushed red, and he was sure he was the same shade as her. “No, I meant-”

“That works,” she interrupted, her voice a bit quieter and shyer than normal. “I mean….it’s the best we can do, right?”

“Right,” he said, his throat suddenly dry. Good god what had he gotten himself into? “Um, do you - do we-”

She laughed lightly and his heart skipped a beat.

“I don’t know either,” she admitted. “I’ve never been with anyone, not romantically and definitely not like  _ that _ .”

“Neither have I,” he confessed, squeezing her hands. “We don’t have to do anything tonight if you don’t want to, Marinette.”

She smiled at him.

“I want to,” she assured. “It  _ is  _ my birthday, after all. Why….Why don’t we just see where the night takes us?”

“Whatever the Birthday Princess wants,” murmured Chat, leaning in close. He hesitated for a moment before he kissed her, chaste and sweet at first. 

His hands cupped her face as he moved his mouth carefully almost lazily, against hers. She tasted like the chocolate and champagne they had been sharing earlier, but underneath that was something he recognized as pure Marinette. 

She sighed happily into the kiss before she deepened it, moving to cup his face as his hands went down to her waist. They shifted so she was pressing his back against the arm of the couch, and she threw her leg over his lap so that she was straddling him.

Marinette was surprisingly bold as she pressed soft kisses along his jawline tugging at the collar of his suit, and he wondered if she had been pining after him as long as he her. If so, he really shouldn’t make her wait any longer. 

Chat gently pushed her away, much to her dismay.

“Let me know if you want to stop,” he told her before he kissed her neck lightly, testing it out, and she inhaled sharply.

“G-Go,” she whispered. 

Chat pressed a few more light kisses on her skin, leaving a small trail from under her ear to her collarbone. And after she got used to the rhythm of it, Chat nipped at her skin and she jumped a bit in his arms.

“Are you alright?” He asked, lips still pressed against her neck.  She shuddered at the vibrations, and when he began to pull away, she buried her fingers in his hair.

“I’m fine,” she assured. “Keep going.”

Chat pressed a kiss to the spot he had just nipped and then bit down on it, chuckling when she gasped. He carefully licked at her skin repeating the process until they were born sure there was a noticeable hickey on her neck.  

She whined when he pulled away, his face undeniably flushed, and she was no better. 

“This isn’t fair” she complained gazing at him with half-lidded eyes. 

With her blush and pout, combined with her kiss-bruised lips, Chat found her utterly ravishing,

“What’s not fair?” He asked her, licking his lips. 

“You can kiss me wherever-”

“And I will,” he interrupted with a smirk, and she stuck her tongue out at him.

“You can kiss me wherever,” she continued, “but I can’t kiss  _ you _ . It’s not fair.”

“Have you tried?” He challenged, his smirk growing. 

_ Plagg, I swear, I will feed you nothing but Kraft Singles for a whole month if you ruin this for me. _

Marinette glowered at him before she grabbed the bell on his collar and pulled. To both their reliefs, it came down like a zipper, and she stopped when enough of his chest was exposed. 

Huffing with determination, Marinette leaned forward and placed an experimental kiss on his collarbone as she slowly ran her hands up his chest to his shoulders. He groaned, not used to her delicate touch, and he carefully ran his gloved hands through her loose, raven hair.

“You’re wearing too much clothing,” she murmured.

“So are you,” he said hoarsely.

“Well, what are you going to do about it, Chat Noir?” She purred, pulling back and giving him the same dating look he had given her just moments before.

Her initial shyness had disappeared, and she smirked at him as she grabbed the hem of her nightshirt and slowly, teasingly pulled it off. 

He swallowed hard, drinking in the sight of her and reveling in the fact that he was the first to see her like this. 

Enthralled, he swept her up in his arms and got to his feet in an instant. She giggled as he carried her to the bedroom and set her down on the edge of the bed. 

Kissing her, he slid his hands down her shoulders, fingers bumping over the straps of her bra, and she sighed. Pulling away, she tucked her thumbs under the waistband of her shorts, and wiggled out of them.

“ _ Chat _ ,” she purred, “I can’t be the only one getting undressed. What did I just say?”

“My apologies,” replied Chat, tugging his bell further down so he could slip his arms out of the suit. 

Marinette curled her fingers around the back of his head and pulled him down for another kiss, her free hand running over his muscular arms and torso. 

Chat pulled off his gloves and hesitated for a moment before  he tentatively cupped her breasts, squeezing them lightly through her bra. She inhaled sharply, breathing get heavier as he pushed the cups up and she near whimpered as his fingers ghosted over her smooth skin, teasing her. 

“Chat, take it off,” she pleaded.  He reached behind her, kissing her shoulder, and unclipped her bra with ease. “You’re surprisingly good at this, Chat Noir. Been wooing any other girls lately,  _ mon minou _ ?”

Chat laughed lightly.

“I assure you, I have no idea what I’m doing. I just know my way around clothes,” he said. “Just tell me when to stop if I go too far, alright?”

With that, Chat took a nipple in his mouth, coating her skin with hot saliva with his tongue, and she near jumped. 

“Stop, I...I don’t like that,” she admitted, pushing his head back a little. Chat nodded and pressed a soft kiss to her collarbone.

“Okay, I won’t do that then,” he assured her. “Do you want me to still touch or are you not comfortable with that?”

Marinette nodded.

“No. I mean, yes, touching is fine too but...uh…” She glanced away, cheeks flushed. “Not up here...but uh...down...there.”

Chat blinked once before he grinned wolfishly at her and her blush deepened. 

“I mean, you don’t have to!” She added quickly. “I know some guys find it gross or whatever so I mean, if you’re not...I've just always been curious…”

“Hey, I certainly don’t mind,” murmured Chat, hands sliding down her body, tucking his thumbs under the band of her underwear. “But this has to come off.”

He slowly pulled the fabric off her hips, down her legs,noting with giddy delight that it was quite damp,, and he threw the discarded fabric over his shoulder. As he did, he pushed himself up slightly to look at Marinette in full, and he was rendered speechless.

“You are so beautiful, Princess,” he said, breathless. “Absolutely gorgeous.”

Of course, that was nothing new. He had known for a long time how attractive she was, and she did too from the flirty winks and giggles she would throw at a few people over the years. But seeing her like this was totally new.

Marinette moved to cover herself, probably embarrassed by his shameless gawking, but he stopped her, grabbing her hands and pulled them away. Then he placed his hands on her knees, carefully sliding up to her smooth thighs, and her breath hitched as he drew closer to where she wanted him.

Chat parted her legs and placed a light kiss on her right inner thigh.

“You can say stop at any time,” he reminded her before he gave her an experimental lick. 

When she jolted and curled her fingers into his hair, he took that as a sign to continue. Pressing his fingers lightly into her firm thighs, he stroked her with his tongue again.

Pause.

Again.

Pause.

_ Again _ .

Marinette moaned softly as he found a steady pace, lapping at her like a kitten with milk. 

It was obvious he was inexperienced by his lack of finesse, but honestly? She felt too good to care. And she wanted him to feel the same spike of pleasure she did.

“Chat….Chat,” she called, using almost all her willpower to  push him away. “Chat, stop.”

Immediately, he leaned away from her and her stomach flip-flopped when she saw his lips glistening with her juices.

“Are you okay?” He asked her, worried.

“Yes, wonderful,” she assured him, sitting up. “Get out of that suit.”

Chat blinked before he pushed the remainder of his suit off his body, and she kissed him, pulling him back down on the bed with her.

“Marinette,” he managed to get out between kisses, “I don’t have any condoms.”

“Neither do I.” She ran her hands over his broad shoulders. “On the pill, it’s fine.”

“Okay,” he said, taking her word for it.

Chat pressed light kisses to her neck as he took hold of himself in one hand, stroking a few times before he prodded her entrance with his tip. She inhaled sharply, feeling him carefully enter her, and she rolled her head to the side as he fully sheathed himself inside of her.

“Okay?” He asked her softly, and she nodded.

“Just a moment,” she answered, and he hummed, distracting her from any discomfort she felt by rubbing his thumbs in circular motions on her waist. “Go.”

Chat pulled himself out nearly all the way before he pushed back in one quick motion, and she let out a loud moan that surprised them both. 

Her eyes met his, and he smiled at her.

“Love me, Chat Noir,” she said breathlessly. “Not as a friend, but as….”

“Of course, Marinette,” he said, understanding. 

And he took her hands, intertwining their fingers as they made love to each other throughout the night.

For that was this was. There was no desperate lust for each other, not like hormone ridden teenagers excited by the moonlight, just a delicate joining of two souls.

And later, when the two of them lay in her bed, basking in their combined warmth and peppering  each other’s bodies with soft kisses, Chat hoped he could be like this with her one day without the mask.

**…**

That was how it started, their relationship. 

Aside from the fact that they couldn’t really go out or tell anyone about each other they dated like any other couple out there in Paris. And their love, their passion, only grew over the weeks they spent together.

Marinette wrapped her arms around his shoulders as she kissed him, rolling her hips over his and she moaned into his mouth as her walls clenched around him. His fingers pressed tightly into her sides, moving her body against his as he set the pace between them.

When he gave a particular sharp thrust, she pulled away and tilted her head back, moaning, and he took advantage of the change to nip at her neck, leaving marks all over her pretty skin.  

“ _ Chaa-aat _ …”

He grinned as she fell apart in his arms and buried her face in his chest, breath hot against his skin. 

(The whole thing with the suit was still really weird, but he wasn’t one to argue with the logics of magical uniforms.)

“Tired?” He asked her, running his fingers through her hair. “Want me to take you to your bed?”

“Mm...not yet,” she said, yawning as she pulled back and smiled at him. “You haven’t eaten your cookies yet, and the water for the hot chocolate sounds like it’s done?”

Chat pretended to swoon, despite the hissing of the kettle hurting his sensitive ears.

“A woman after my own heart,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Do you mind if I shower?”

“No, go ahead,” she said, getting off his lap. “I’ll have to clean up later.”

Marinette leaned down to pick up her shorts, shimmying back into them before she went into her kitchen, and Chat watched her go before he got up himself.  

He couldn’t wait to freshen up and settle into the warm embrace of his lovely girlfriend; the cookies and hot chocolate would just be a nice bonus.

Unfortunately, there was always one person in Paris who refused to let anyone have a  _ single _ moment of peace and he almost always had the worst timing ever. 

Today, apparently, was no exception as the ground shook beneath them, and Marinette flinched as her coffee mugs fell off the counter as a result of the vibrations. 

The crash of the mugs breaking against the tiles had Chat running back to the kitchen, eyes wide.

“Are you okay?” He asked her, making sure she wasn’t touching the broken pieces. 

“Mm, fine,” assured Marinette, grabbing the counter to stop herself from falling. She reached over to turn the gas off on the stove. “Go and stop whoever’s causing trouble now. The cookies will still be here when you come back.”

Chat Noir bit his lip. He knew she was right but he was always reluctant to leave her during an attack; he worried too much, and Ladybug was starting to notice. 

“Okay,” he said finally, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Stay safe, Princess.”

She gave him a small smile, looking almost amused.

“I’ll be fine,” said Marinette, gently pushing him to the balcony. “Go, hurry.”

Chat nodded and kissed her one last time before he leaped off the balcony railing, following the vibrations of the akuma as quickly as he could.

His rush to finish the battle did not go unnoticed by either Ladybug or Hawkmoth, who taunted him on it through the mouth of his latest victim. His partner was not entirely pleased either; he didn’t do anything sloppily - he took his duties as a hero seriously - but it was clear she was taken aback by his lack of banter, and he made a mental note to apologize during patrol later that week.

Again.

Truth be told, being Chat Noir had been his freedom as a teenager, a sacred aspect of his life that brought him joy he wasn’t accustomed to, but now….now being Chat Noir meant something  _ more  _ to him.

It meant kept keeping the city a safe place not just for everyone living there but especially for Marinette, so that she could live the good life he wanted for her without the looming risk of danger and chaos Hawkmoth tended to bring.

So, really, who could blame him for being a bit more reckless, daring, than before?

Grabbing the fire wielder by her flaming arms, launching himself into a 50 ft tall nest of thorns, having a bear trap clamp down on his thigh….he’d do it all - he’d do anything to finish the battle, get one step closer to the ending the war, to bringing peace for a new life for her.

But he knew Ladybug didn’t like it, his new reckless behavior, and neither did Marinette. She had told him, time and time again, to stop throwing himself in harm’s way, to be patient and listen to Ladybug. 

He knew she was probably right, but he also knew they couldn’t afford to show any caution with Hawkmoth or the villain of Paris might strike harder and swoop the city under his wing.

Bell missing and suit partially torn across his chest, Chat Noir climbed back into Marinette’s apartment through the same way he had left from. The lights were off, and the place was oddly quiet.

He found her in the kitchen, sitting at the table with two mugs of hot chocolate in front of her.  She rested her chin on her hands, a thoughtful frown on her face.

“You did it again,” she said, her voice soft. She pushed a mug towards him as he sat in the seat opposite of her. “We talked about this, Chat Noir.”

He didn’t ask how she knew. 

“I know,” he told her, matching her tone. “It’s my job, Princess -  _ Marinette _ . It’s not always fun and games, but I have to do it. I  _ want  _ to do it.”

“To keep Paris safe?” Marinette finally looked at him, hands wrapped around her untouched drink.

“To keep you safe,” he corrected, never wavering from her intense gaze. “I have to do whatever I can to keep the city safe for you.”

“At what cost, Chat Noir?” She sighed. “Look at you. Today was a good day, sure, but how many times have you struggled to even make it back here after a battle? Ladybug’s magic…..it doesn’t fix everything anymore, not like when we were younger. You need to be  _ careful _ .”

“So you keep telling me,” said Chat, reaching to fiddle with his bell only to remember at the last second that it had been lost in battle. He knew it would appear again the next time he transformed though; it always did. “But I keep telling  _ you  _ that I do what’s necessary to end the war with Hawkmoth.”

They weren’t fighting. They’ve had this discussion too many times to blow up or even raise their voices above whispers. 

But somehow...today felt different, and he didn’t know why. Everything had been the same as usual, from the second he had woken up.

“All for me, right?” Marinette asked, and there seemed to be something resigned in her voice this time, different than their other talks. 

She waited for his answer, despite them already knowing what it was.

“Yes,” he answered, staring down at his drink, still filled to the top of the mug. He wasn’t craving anything sweet anymore. Something heavy had settled in the pit of his stomach. “For you, Marinette. I want you to be happy….I don’t want you to worry about something happening in the city and hurting you.”

“So that justifies you getting hurt instead?”

“Yes.”

Marinette nodded, taking in his words for a few moments.

“I love you, Chat Noir,” she said, her voice strong and confident so he understood she meant what she said. 

Chat Noir met her gaze, finding a new unspoken message in her eyes, one he knew she wouldn’t be able to say aloud on her own. 

“I love you too.” He reached across the table, and she met him halfway to intertwine their fingers. “I always will.”

Marinette squeezed his hand, and she blinked rapidly so as to not cry.

“You can’t though. I need you to let go, Chat Noir, because if you love me, you will always end up hurt in the end, and I can’t stand the thought of being the reason. I could never forgive myself.”

He was glad he hadn’t drunk his hot chocolate now; there was no way he’d be able to swallow it with how twisted his stomach was now, how choked he felt.

He thought back to the night they first kissed, when they first agreed a relationship wouldn’t work, only to turn around and get in one anyways.

“Do you regret it?” He asked her, and she shook her head immediately.

“I could never.” 

She didn’t dare release his hand as she got up and came to his side. He pressed his forehead against her stomach, and she kissed the top of his head. A moment later, he felt something wet fall into his hair at the same time her body shook with sobs. If possible, his heart broke further.

“Goodbye, Chat Noir.”


End file.
